The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Dear ABJ-

You never fail to impress upon me just how extremely angry you can make me.  I love watching day in and day out just how incompetent people are, especially when they work the job I used to work.  I also love to see how many people have credit for things that I did when i was in said job.  I love watching people lie, cheat, and steal and get patted on the back for it.  ALSO it is my absolute favorite when no one does their job and expects me to pick up the slack.  Thanks for never realizing hey the person that is the closing shift is actually on vacation…oh well that must be my problem now…what I call my manager and that said manager never picks up the phone?  Oh well.  I love dealing with all these shannanigans when you have never paid me enough, try daily to make me feel like my talents are not as amazing as I KNOW they are, and make me feel like a crazy angry person that wants to set fire to a building.  ABJ you never disapoint when wanting to make me pull out my hair, scream, cry, and set fire to a building.  My hatred for you has grown  a hundred times over.  My poor family hears daily about how i just want to shoot bitches.  I thought I could deal with you ABJ-but i just may have been mistaken.

I HATE YOU. 

Sincerely,

GBU2

This poem is dedicated to all those non-believers out there that think I am capable of learning to blow my nose, when I know I am not capable of it. Not by choice, but by genetics.

There once was a girl who had a runny nose,

that made her cough and sneeze.

It was quite red and sniffley

because she had a cold.

Day and night her nose would run,

It caused her such disgrace.

She shoved the tissues up her nostrils

And  hoped it would fall off her face.

For she could not blow her nose,

Try and try as she might,

Her nose refused to give in.

To the blows from within.

Many a friend had tried to teach her,

But her nose would not be taught.

It was stubborn as all hell.

And would only run more as if to say “I care not”

So, this girl continued to stuff tissues up her nose,

Hoping to appease it

Her nose was the culprit for all the pain

And replied, when asked, you blow in vain.

Moral of Story: Do not mock those that cannot blow their noses, or you will reap the curse of the “Revenge of the Nose”

If you do not know what this is, be very afraid. It is a terrible curse which inflicts only those who mock those that cannot blow their noses.

Germs are spreading fast and mutating.

Soon my army of mucus will overtake this place! My germs will conquer you in silent, but deadly force.

Be scared, workplace people I don’t like, be very scared.

Just curious.

Is it bad that I come to work, with the intent to spread my germs everywhere?

Or is it worse that no one I work with cares?

Or is it worse yet, that I work in a healthcare environment?

Being the evil person that I am, I hope they all get it!

Right now, I want to marry Hubby again.

He has cleaned the house, while I wallowed in my dirty blankets with my stuffy nose watching the worst movie ever, Private Valentine…don’t ask. I love Jessica Simpson, but that movie was horrible. At least it made me forget my germs for a bit.

So, lo and behold Hubby shows me the bedroom, which he has cleaned for hours…no more does the smell of snotty tissues, dog barf (the dog barfed yesterday in our room…luckily, due to my sickness, NOT IT rules did NOT apply) and the bathroom sink is CLEAN. YAY! I am so happy.

However, this made me think of a very funny memory. One of my first times visiting Hubby’s hometown in Texas, I got really sick with some kind of cold/flu thing. So, Hubby’s Mom took care of me. And I was grateful. But, here is my memory. She cleaned the entire room I was staying in from top to bottom, changed all the sheets and then just as I was getting ready to get into my new, clean sick nest…..she sprayed everything….including my pillows with Lysol! And I don’t mean a little bit of Lysol. BUT, I mean drenched everything in Lysol. It was horrible…the smell….ugh. And now Lysol scares me. It really does.

To this day, when I get sick, Hubby says if I don’t behave he is going to spray me with Lysol. And THAT is enough to make realize how lucky I am when Hubby makes me a nice, clean sick area….Lysol Free!

P.S. I guess I will stop writing mean things about him for now…